Conversations with Family

Mum

“No, seriously, I’m full.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“What? No, come on, I’m – ”

“I made all of this rice for you.”

“Give it to Sriram!”

“NO I’M DONE.”

“What were you doing in America, anyway? I thought you said you’d kill for sambar rice. Here.”

“No, I -”

“Too bad, it’s on your plate now. Eat it.”

“But I – !”

Brother

“I have a question for you, Sriram.”

“What’s up.”

“If you were a doughnut, would you eat yourself?” *

“…. what? Um. I would try.

“I think it depends on the type of doughnut.”

“Wait, wouldn’t I feel pain?”

“I dunno, do you have a central nervous system or a peripheral one?”

“If I didn’t have a CNS would I know I wanted to eat myself?”

“And if you had a PNS you’d feel pain.”

“…hmmm.”

Dad

“Sriram, put down that book.”

“…that‘s Sriram, dad, not me.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“That’s okay, we know you’re old.”

“Listen you kids. Do you remember that banana?”

“…what?”

“Oh yeah! The Romanian banana.”

What are the two of you talking about?!”

“Sorry mum. Dad gave me a banana a long time ago. And it had “Romania” written on it.”

“Because children in Romania don’t see bananas. And I want my kids to appreciate what they have.”

“… this family is insane.”

“No Sriram, I think it’s just dad.”

———-

*credit to Community

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